Getting engaged is such a memorable, magical, special time in any love story! The chapter is filled with lots of love, happy tears, champagne, sparkly diamonds, celebrations and loved ones coming together to celebrate. No matter how often you and your boo have talked about the future, things really don't really feel REAL until he gets on his knee, the ring is on that finger and the wedding planning officially begins. Personally, we are so thankful that we had our wedding to plan during our 8 months of long distance. The brainstorming, creative thinking, and Pinterest surfing kept our minds busy and inspired while we were apart. It was a time to reminisce on everything we've been through together and bring the most cherished parts of our relationship to life through every detail of our wedding. It was magical to see our visions truly come to life throughout the entire process.
Although wedding planning is fun, romantic and exciting, it can also get pretty stressful behind the scenes. That's right y'all! In between every #howheasked, #isaidyestothedress, and #bridesquad hashtag, there are some not-so-instagram-worthy moments that happen before & on the big day that no one really likes to talk about. Here are a few things we wish we knew leading up to our wedding.
You Will Hear Opinions from Everyone - Trust Your Gut
From the moment he pops the question, you will both be bombarded by questions. Can I see the ring? Did he pick it out himself? Do you two have a date in mind? Where are you thinking of having the wedding? Are you guys going to have a theme? What are your colors? What kind of dress do you want? How big is your wedding party going to be? Family, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers will give their two cents about how wedding planning "should" go. It constantly feels like all eyes are on you to make a gazillion decisions. No matter how many times you tell yourself that you won't let the stress get to you, it will get to you one way or another. This isn't meant to scare you, it's intended to prepare you. As challenging as it can be at times, we encourage you to drown out the buzz of opinions and just focus on your love for each other. If you are having trouble making a decision, pause, pray and really think about how YOU two want to celebrate your forever.
It’s Okay to Change Your Mind
No matter how clear your vision is for your special day, sometimes it can be tough to sift through all of the external pressures and opinions. Whether it's the colors of your napkins, your menu, your first dance song, or even your dress (yep, did that), we are here to tell you that it is okay to rethink something that you have already decided on. In our opinion, social media makes it feel like couples are supposed to figure everything out with ease and certainty. We remember feeling guilty about being indecisive in fear that people were going to see it as a sign of not us not being able to commit. We look back now and realize how silly that was and are thankful that we trusted our gut and revisited every aspect of our wedding multiple times to be sure that everything was truly about OUR love story. Planning a party is never easy - Especially the most significant one of your life. Don't be so hard on yourselves!
Budget for an Experienced Day of Coordinator
A wedding planner and/or day-of-coordinator can be one of those vendors that couples cut out to save money. We are going to speak from experience here; It is NOT recommended to cut this out as a money saver. Even if you have a guest list full of helpful family and friends, an experienced, outgoing, professional coordinator will be well worth the investment. On your wedding day, you want your family and friends to relax and celebrate with you, not answer a million questions from the vendors or run around solving unexpected problems. Relieving you and your guests from the day-of stress is worth every penny you invest in someone who is responsible, credible and detail oriented.
It Will Always Go Faster Than You Think
As an event coordinator and wedding photographer, Britt constantly emphasized this tip as the wedding day approached. But, no matter how prepared you think you are, your wedding day will STILL feel like it flew by in a blink. Our advice to combat this phenomenon is to set aside time to just BE together. Find a quiet place to pray, reminisce and take in the moment. Personally, our favorite part of our wedding day was our ceremony where we spent 30-40 minutes looking at each other with tear-filled eyes while our officiant (who was a family friend), talked us through what it means to build a loving, lasting marriage. We will never forget how full our hearts were as we stood beneath the trees, squeezing each others hands while looking at each other like "we are doing this!" Although your wedding does involve celebrating with your family and friends, it's mostly about celebrating your togetherness, professing your vows and solidifying your covenant with God and each other. So soak it in!
Ask Someone Responsible to Manage Your Exit Plan
Leading up to our wedding, we read countless blogs and articles about how to prepare for our wedding day. We got tips on how to stay stress free in the morning, how to handle the most common hiccups, and how to balance our time between family, friends and each other. The articles were all super helpful, but none of them really emphasized the importance of a solidified exit strategy. Not only did we have a bunch of out of town family and friends that wanted to spend more time with us after the reception was over at 10pm, William and I are both the kind of people to just "wing it" a lot of the time. Although we pride ourselves in our spontaneity, "winging it" in this case led to someone calling us an Uber, Britt leaving her phone at the venue, and William having no service on his Italian phone. Lol, whoops! Moral of the story - Weddings are not exactly the place to place to "wing" anything.
“You have been assigned this mountain so that
you can show others it can be moved.”―Mel Robbins
Although we may wish that someone would've shared these things with us while we were planning our wedding, we are thankful for the lessons God weaved into each experience. We can now offer plenty of advice to those planning their weddings and have some pretty funny stories to tell our children when they're older. Our greatest advice to newly engaged couples above all is to focus on your love, embrace the planning process and use this time to learn more about how you want to approach your marriage. Times of planning, budgeting and celebrating are great opportunities to trust God, grow together and come out on the other side ready to face the world, united in as one. We are praying that our advice can ease some of your challenges in this exciting chapter. It's all about the love, y'all. Don't ever forget it!
Please feel free to contact us with any specific questions about wedding planning!
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